The Reminder is making its archives back to 2003 available on our website. Please note that, due to technical limitations, archive articles are presented without the usual formatting.
The number-one mistake people make with online dating is rushing into that first face-to-face meeting, says Evan Marc Katz, author of America's hottest book on online dating, 'I Can't Believe I'm Buying This Book'. By scoping out the options on the phone beforehand, you weed out all the psychos. The more time you invest prior to the date, the more likely it will be a successful date. Go out with a total stranger and you might as well be on a blind date. Take a week to email, talk on the phone and build up rapport. At the very least, if there's no chemistry, you might end up with a new friend." "When I first started Internet dating," says Katz, "I wrote impersonal letters to dozens of women, taking more phone numbers than a bathroom wall, and penciling in half-hour coffee dates three or four nights a week. It's not a coincidence that none of these women stayed in my life for more than a third date." Katz has controversial advice for online daters. For example, middle-aged women may have to fudge about their ages. "There's an arbitrary cut-off point on ages on all the dating websites," says Katz, "so if middle-aged women are honest about their ages, they often get very little response. It's okay for a woman to shave a year or two off her age if her next birthday is going to put her into a different bracket. Staying 39 instead of turning 40 is okay, or calling yourself 49 instead of 51. It's the only way women can get a fair shake in cyberspace." Katz also identifies the five biggest turnoffs in Internet personal ads: 1. Spelling errors. 2. Profiles that sound just like everyone else. 3. Negativity in ads. 4. Incomplete essays. See 'Online' P.# Con't from P.# 5. Laundry lists of adjectives, activities, or physical specifications. Katz is the Founder of E-Cyrano.com, the world's first online dating consulting service, which is available to the 45 million people who are now dating on the Internet. "Looking for love online is like job-hunting," says Katz. "In a competitive market you need every edge you can get. A profile is the equivalent of a resume in that it's the most important tool you have to make a first impression." Katz is the keynoted speaker at an upcoming convention sponsored by American Singles Education, Inc., the world's largest non-profit singles organization; and The Relationship Exchange, based in Edmonton, Canada, a successful network of 'private label' on-line dating sites, working together and sharing a database of over 3 million active profiles.
